Got a dog? Then face it, you’re a fascist. No point in protesting. Even if your politics are outwardly liberal, inside you are a secret dictator. You like having another living creature to order around. You love being the big man, the alpha male, the top dog in your pack: even if the pack is just you and a toy poodle called Fluffy. As Aldous Huxley said, “To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.” And that quote comes to you courtesy of Nick Haslam, Professor of Psychology at the University of Melbourne, who has just published a paper suggesting that people who are competitive and want to dominate others are more likely to have dogs. A column for Telegraph Men.